


its your turn to be honest now

by studiokillers (alanaheck)



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Coming Out, Meteorstuck, bi dave strider, if you ship dersecest fuck off theyre siblings you weirdo, lesbian rose lalonde, like no joke naruto plays a role in this, naruto - Freeform, pesterlogs, rose and dave are about 14 in this one?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-17
Updated: 2019-04-17
Packaged: 2020-01-15 13:53:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,527
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18500356
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alanaheck/pseuds/studiokillers
Summary: a conversation about anime takes a deeper turn, and dave and rose realize just how similar the two of them are.





	its your turn to be honest now

**Author's Note:**

> this fic is dedicated to roland (@chuusfavoritelesbian on tumblr) and their own naruto-themed gay awakening. many thanks to ezra (@puglebug on tumblr) for proofreading this!

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering tentacleTherapist [TT] 

TG: man you know what’s fucked up 

TG: we’ve lost like any and all semblance of normal people shit to this game 

TG: i mean goddamn i live in some sort of fucked-up group housing situation with some guys i met on the internet

TG: this is the exact kinda deal people’s parents warned them about probably

TG: except with like 

TG: more aliens i guess 

TT: That is pretty fucked up, yes.

TT: This might come as a shock to you, but living on a meteor with a group of trolls was not exactly how I expected to spend my teen years.

TT: I was hoping to study psychology, actually

TG: nah that’s not the most bullshit part

TG: the most bullshit part is that you’d think i’d miss like

TG: my room or my favorite food or whatever

TG: but what i miss the most is

TG: this may come as a shock to you

TG: mother

TG: fucking

TG: naruto

TT: Naruto?

TG: naruto

TT: I don’t think I'm following.

TG: damn right you're not

TG: it’s the best anime out there

TG: shit’s off the wall

TG: the plot makes no sense it’s almost transcendent in how stupid it is

TG: it’s a can of pre-packaged dumbass and i am a lonely 30-year-old man in his mother’s basement about to microwave that shit

TT: Trust me, I know how Naruto is.

TT: I’ve watched a couple episodes myself, I’ll have you know.

TT: But like you were saying, the plot took a nosedive into unrealistic.

TT: I’m not sure how the writers expected anyone to believe in the Sasuke/Sakura romance.

TG: fucking SASUKE man

TG: that dude’s off the shits

TG: he’s accidentally kissed naruto like twenty fucking times

TG: my bro told me that and i was instantly compelled to inject every season of naruto directly into my eyeballs

TT: Dave.

TG: i don’t think you’re getting how fucking great that shit is

TG: two straight dudes just keep kissing each other

TG: it just keeps happening

TT: Dave.

TG: that’s like if i tripped and it just so happened that my mouth landed directly on karkats mouth

TG: just by fuckin coincidence

TT: Dave!

TG: what

TG: oh god fucking damn it

TT: What was it you said to me the other day?

TT: Oh, yes. Now I remember.

TT: “I diagnose you with gay.”.

TG: i cant believe this

TG: i’m sitting here drinking my fucking apple juice

TG: and you’re coming in here and saying this to me

TG: unbelievable 

TT: Don’t make light of this, Dave. Your diagnosis is quite a serious thing.

TT: The amount of gay you are is chronic and incurable.

TT: It’ll be with you for the rest of your days.

TT: And on your gravestone, the engraving will say “Here lies Dave Strider.”.

TT: “He was just too damn gay to be alive.”

TG: nah fuck that

TG: id like to see some kinda medical certification

TG: youre out here throwing around diagnoses so fast i could slap a beat over everything you say and put it on my mixtape

TG: and then throw the mixtape directly in the goddamn trash because no one would ever listen to that shit

TT: One doesn’t have to be a trained professional to identify what’s going on with you.

TT: You know it’s alright, don’t you?

TT: I mean, listen.

TT: You’re not.

TT: Alone.

TT: In your diagnosis.

TG: well no shit

TG: ive seen how much you and kanaya sneak off together

TG: and even if i hadnt karkat talks about it all the fucking time

TG: would be hard to avoid

TT: Oh, really?

TT: Are the two of you spending so much time together?

TG: whatever amount of time me and karkat may or may not be spending together is none of your business

TG: thats my fuckin jurisdiction

TG: im the bitch of time

TT: And I’m the bitch of light.

TT: That means that I simply must investigate any knowledge that I come across.

TT: I’m just compelled to by a force beyond myself.

TG: *god* i fucking hate light players

TG: sticking your noses everywhere like youre terezi or some shit

TT: Hm.

TT: You emphasize your words just like Karkat does.

TT: That’s cute.

TG: ok listen this isn’t about me and karkats relationship

TG: which goes NOWHERE past casual friendship just for the record

TG: entirely uncomplicated dude times thats all it is

TG: this is about you

TG: i dont want any bullshitting i just want an honest answer

TG: rose

TG: are you gay

TT: I thought I had done a decent job of communicating that earlier.

TT: But if you need a concrete answer, then...

TT: Yes, Dave, I’m gay.

TT: Does that satisfy your raging curiousity?

TG: well shit

TG: i wasn’t expecting to get an actual genuine response

TG: uh

TG: the hell do i even say here

TG: congrats?

TG: mazel tov on your gayness i guess

TT: Thank you so much, Dave.

TT: I’m truly blessed to have such a supportive brother.

TT: Really, I’m in tears over this beautiful display of allyship.

TG: hey

TG: you know i was just fucking around right

TG: im actually like

TG: proud of you

TG: for figuring this shit out about yourself

TG: shits fucking complicated i wish i had that kinda skill

TG: guess thats why youre the bitch of light

TG: always got the knowledge and shit

TG: while the rest of us are stuck here guessing

TT: Dave.

TT: It’s your turn to be honest now, alright?

TT: I don’t want any of your general Strider-brand deflecting and bullshitting.

TT: I just want you to be genuine with me.

TT: Do you think you’re gay?

TG: i

TG: fuck

TG: i think

TG: there’s a chance

TG: i might be bi

TT: A chance, might…

TT: All this hypothetical language.

TT: It’s alright to be explicit.

TT: Don’t act like I don’t already know you want Karkat to be the Sasuke to your Naruto.

TG: okay FIRST of all

TG: you got the dynamic wrong

TG: karkats clearly the naruto here

TG: the dude is just a whole mess of emotions shoved into a 5’2 frame

TG: he has so many fucking feelings dude

TG: your astrology website was right when it told me cancers are the most emotional pieces of shit youll ever meet

TG: bold of you to assume that just because im bi i like karkat

TG: almost

TG: homophobic of you even

TG: are you a homophobe rose

TT: You know it.

TT: I’m not just gay, I’m homophobic. I’m glad I could finally tell you this.

TT: I’m still the same person I always was. I hope you can accept me.

TG: hell yeah

TG: god

TG: can you believe we ended up coming out to each other over fucking naruto

TT: Honestly?

TT: Considering our dynamic, and pretty much every conversation we’ve ever had, I can very much believe that.

TT: I am past the point of being surprised by anything anymore.

TT: That being said,

TT: I’m proud of you for doing this.

TT: God knows I haven’t made it any easier for you.

TG: whoa hey

TG: you thought it was just jokes man

TG: like yeah it affected me a little but at no point did i think you’d hate me

TG: i just thought you’d like

TG: make fun of me

TG: in your pseudointellectual kinda style where its like what youre saying is probably true youre just being a dick about it

TT: See, that’s my point!

TT: You shouldn’t have had to think that.

TT: It shouldn’t have affected you at all.

TT: I should have had the self-awareness to keep my jokes in line.

TT: Whether what I was saying was true or not doesn’t matter, don’t you get that?

TT: It was cruel of me.

TT: And I need to own up to that.

TG: shit dude

TG: i never expected to get like

TG: an actual apology

TG: probably cause

TG: never really knew i wanted one

TG: but considering that we got to this point of you actually saying you’re sorry and me actually realizing that feels like something i needed i want you to know

TG: it’s fine dude

TG: we’re all good

TT: Are you sure?

TG: positive

TG: listen i gotta go now

TG: karkat wants to watch some shitty troll romcom and you know im not missing out on making fun of that

TG: so i guess go make out with kanaya or something

TT: You know what? I think I will.

TT: Next time you see me, I’m gonna have green lipstick all over my face.

TT: Or black, depending.

TT: And Eridan's blood, potentially.

TT: Which is about the most hardcore goth anyone has ever been.

TG: fuck yeah get it

TG: alright well

TG: see you later ig

\-- turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering tentacleTherapist [TT]

TT: See you later, Dave.

**Author's Note:**

> first time writing homestuck fic! tell me how you liked it in the comments. if you wanna reach me personally, im @christinecanigula on tumblr


End file.
